20/20 Gonzo 25: Hot Juices

The bats are back in the wet markets of China.  The soup, the stir fry, raw.  In my kitchen, a slow cooked beef roast simmers in a crockpot, whole carrots and red potatoes, tender in the hot juices.  Overnight it was made perfect, time did it's thing.  Real meat, not bats.

The statistics are everywhere.  Ratios, percentages, testing access, ventilator capacity, mask stockpiles, survival rates, mortality odds, confirmed deaths, age groups.  Sliced, compared, graphed, used, all the numbers will be exploited by the political professionals.  Only two sides to join, however, for professionals anyway.  They will twist from their homes.  Double free agents are rare.

The Rona is indifferent, indiscriminate, and invisible.  Keep your distance, outside the perimeter.  Sneezes can travel 10 yards.  Reporting from the rose garden, with the doctors and business leaders, and others.  Fear the rose garden podium microphone, the microphone could be infected, it could be full of The Rona, that microphone gets spit on daily by multiple people.  Wind's picking up, it's hairspray weather in DC.

Avoid Mobs

...that's my water bottle.
No, I just got one out a minute ago.
...but that one is cold, it's mine, trust me.
Quit ridiculing me.
...that's ridiculous, that's not ridicule.
You know, you're impossible.
...no, I don't know, no one is impossible.
See, right there, what you just said.
... just making a point, like an observation.
You and your observations.
...here, this one is your water, drink up.
Oh, that's right, that one's mine.
...episode 6 tomorrow maybe.
Those people are so weird.
...don't be a follower, avoid mobs.

Twilight Zoning

Broke and stockbrokering.

Dimensions and conceptualizing.

Jay's custom stringing.

Around the world hunkering.

HBO came calling.

Check his remembering.

Nothing worse than bad bossing.

Players only love it when they're playing.

Finally got sick of trucking.

Tired of all that seducing.

Martin Mulligan recounting.

Naturalized Italian still FILAing.

Lots and lots of interviewing.

Keeping the show popping.

How's Nick Bollettieri doing?

The downside of credentialing.

Unacknowledged for the digging.

Depends on what you mean by interesting.

Hiring to firings.

The story of not disliking.

Former number one boasting.

Losses make up for the winning.

Journalists inquiring.

Wrong about the overreacting.

Had no feeling.

Twilight zoning.

BG been isolationing.

Doing good as they were practicing.

Tournaments are just moving.

Events need saving.

Tennis might start booming.

Line up for the testing.

The lousy and the pandering.

Topic jumping.

Memory is searing.

Must have fueled all the ass kicking.

Venus and Serena pioneering.

And the James Blake cuffing.

Keep up the barking.

U.S. Open running.

Sergio Tacchini is missing.

The glorious Martina pairing.

Start the thinking.

Momma been sleepbagging.

Beware the entourageing.

King Richard is filming!

Devil's Been Lurking Like A Coward

D7G
CG
D7C
D7CG

Now I understand.
We are made to overcome.
Our anti-bodies, our virus attackers.
Just let them have their guns.

Now I realize.
They slide and they pop.
Storm through the atoms and the cells.
You know they won't ever stop.

Now I just breathe.
Take in some good air.
Get some nitrogen and some oxygen.
No need to be so scared.

Now I step back.
See it for what it is.
Devil's been lurking like a coward.
Seeing if he can't stay hid.

Now I take 5.
Whenever I need some time.
Been liberated from death itself.
Got it through my mind.

20/20 Gonzo 24: The Smug Bug Club

Seems shockingly unfair and phobic to call this damn virus the Coronavirus.  The Corona Brewing Company had nothing to do with this unfortunate viral development, but now almost 40% of their main demographic (Dumb beer sheep convinced by ads they are drinking decent Mexican beer, aged 25-50) believe that drinking a Corona Extra is death sentence.  They are doomed, their brand is toast, call it a kegger.  DosXX, Pacificos, Modeloes, and Sols are all better anyway, but it's still sad, it's still an ender.  Never bought in to the urban myth of piss in the Corona brew, but it wasn't an overly outlandish accusation, it might've been true.

This Hydroxychloroquine, taken along with the mighty Z-Pack, seems promising, and the anti-bodies are plentiful now, vaccines are in development.  The end is in sight.  Politicians will take credit, they will blame and sneer, they will not make us proud.  The newspeople will do their tabloiding, it is all they know.  The smug bug club.

A resurrection of our American life is on the horizon, we will get busy again, we will consume, we will have it our way.  It will be made in the U.S.A., by yankees, doodles, and dandies.  China already has a Great Wall, but it didn't seem to work.  Viruses don't care about walls, they are busy mutating.  They lurk.

Gotta Go Near The Alamo

GGFC

FFGC

Ozzy Osbourne on a drinking binge.

Fired his whole band in a manic fit.

Doing the Sabbath record on his own.

Gotta go, gotta go, near the Alamo.

Davy Crockett came from Tennessee.

Then the Mexicans started the seige.

Played his fiddle when the sun went low.

Gotta go, it's sundown at the Alamo.

Never forget about that Juan Seguin.

Slipped out before the final scene.

Carried the news that all needed to know.

Gotta go, God help the Alamo.

G
C
GF
FGC

Sitting on the Riverwalk.
Having some brews.
Pacifico after Pacifico.
Let it flow near the Alamo.
Spotted the bathrooms.
Over the river bridge.
Be right back, gotta go.
Gotta go near the Alamo.

Jim Bowie and his big ole Bowie knife.

Victory or death, Barrett Travis gave his life.

They let Susanna and her baby girl go.

Gotta go, go tell em bout the Alamo.

Santa Anna he was a murdering thug.

Nothing could quench his thirst for blood.

Houston took him down in San Jacinto.

Gotta go, remember the Alamo

Ozzy Osborne banned for a decade.

San Antone told him to stay away.

Apologized before he played another show.

Gotta go, gotta go, to the Alamo.

20/20 Gonzo 23: Keeping The Cool

These potential solutions and resolutions, propelling our future, redefining our culture, changing the game, awakening our society.  Meanwhile, the finest checker players in the world gathered in the newsrooms, huddled up for the Zoom meeting, and plotted their next play.  One move at a time, isolated in the present, victims of historical ignorance and horizon blindness.  No nuance, only bluster, low IQ, low EQ, the basic minds.  Cheering themselves.
   
The chess players wait their turn, hooks baited.  Learning from the past, anticipating the future.  The knights, the rooks, the bishops, even the pawns.  All working together to defend, attack, flank, maneuver, and set up.  Working the boards, keeping the cool, checking the mates.

In China, commies do what commies do, we've all seen this before. Only our capitalism makes them go. However, the demand for their supply is shrinking fast, they are the thugs of Asia. Their people want their MTV too, they mourn, Mao is squirming in his tomb. The liberty virus is highly contagious.

Day To Day Days

EA

Rest in peace, they say.
As if there's any other way.
No noise, no distractions, no war.
Peace in earth.
That's when.

Anyhow, back to the day to day days.
Provisions and prospects, hungry for hope.
Sanitized, fumigated, and bleached.

The cycles of our movements, the routines of our cycles, the movements of our routines.

The Slanted Court

Extended introduction.

Plant based future.

All name hall of fame.

Shouldn't be, but supposed to be.

Europe ain't swinging.

Speaking of dysfunction.

And open lines of communication.

Spin the wheels of the mind.

AWOL for 15 minutes.

Serve and control, partial.

No gluten, no dairy, no sugar.

First five set loss.

Terrible, terrible, terrible, just terrible.

Back to the Ramada Inn.

Different levels of brutal.

Blacked out like old school.

The slanted court.

Choked on the warm up.

South African playing dreams.

Mediocre.

Tennys on Line 4.

Serious and unsquandered.

No wrong decisions to make.

Tough club.

Unexpected results were unexpected.

Came from the grass slam.

Worn out and torn out labrum.

Top 100.

Liked the problematic.

The worst interrpetation.

Triple A right around the corner.

Summer might be a wash.

Can't gather for our tennis.

Stockton Challenger shotgun blast.

Wind tunnel.

Auckland.

Lean and mean solo travel.

Coaches want more coaching.

Beyond good and evil.

Tools and staples.

Yards at the yard house.

Hysterical.

The king is moving back to wood.

More dink and dunk.

Losing the aesthetics.

Stay Away

GC
DCG

You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.

You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.

You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.

You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.
You stay away from me,
I stay away from you.

20/20 Gonzo 22: The Scarecrowers

Silver linings are all around.  The end of handshake culture, reinforcement of proper sanitary habits, cancellation of MLB baseball games, a dating freeze.  A real social awakening, you stay away from me, I stay away from you.  Young people all over America are cheering school closings.  No word on prorated tuition rebates, but it seems a legitimate request considering circumstances.

The political finger pointers know of nothing else to do but point at their opponents, tacky or not.  They pounce like buzzards going after roadkill, they stir it up, they slither under the notion of leadership.  They lead nothing but the panic.  The classless class, the manipulators, the dumb, the scarecrowers.  May the crows shit upon them.

This is no high horse, it is the low horse for sure.  From the observation basement, from the middle of the fight, from the hunker down bunker, from the wine cellar.  Remote, but alive and reporting the stories.  Sheltering, distancing, unsocializing, stocking, disinfecting, listening, learning.  No coughing, or coffin, yet.

Our Private Pads

AmAmFG
D7D7CEm

Lost an hour to the devil, never got it back.
That virus gonna give me a stress attack.

Pandemic panic bout to drive us all mad.
Confined to the confines of our private pads.

Blocking out the wind, cutting out the germs.
Everything's cancelled, hotels got burned.

Gone are the good times and memories.
Maybe just for now, temporarily.


GC
FD7Am

Wash your hands.
Cover your sneeze, please.
Wash your hands.
Cover your sneeze, please.


Look at the stars, listen to some disco.
Watch some movies, check out a few shows.

Get some sun, let it burn your skin.
Before we freak out and everyone goes in.

Do what you want, don't need an event.
A ticket booth or hospitality tent.

Won't catch nothing while driving the road.
Windows down, crank the radio.

Hunker Down Blues

AmEmx3
D7GAm

Bounce.
          Bounce.
                    Bounce.
Down.
          It.
                    Goes.
Round.
          Round.
                    Round.
Isolationism.
          Is.
                    Viral.
Hunker.
          Down.
                    Blues.
Trickle.
          Trickle.
                    Trickle.
Loss.
          Is.
                    Gain.
Only.
          If.
                    Crazy.
Reason.
          Reason.
                    Reason.
Think.
          Things.
                     Through.
Minds.
          Create.
                     Life.
Blank.
           Blank.
                     Blank.

Red Mud Gonzo: Seventeen

"Technical Form And Mechanical Solutions"  by jpg

All you weary tennis vagabonds, all you lost souls of technical form and mechanical solutions, all you attired and tired, all you Dallas nobles with your products and networks and drinking establishments.  Once a year, just once a year, let's go to Houston.  Despite the zoning, despite the grid, despite the unpleasant.  Split the room how ever many ways.  Rooftop views, they know we're coming, but they are not prepared.



"Isolationism" by jpg

Houston is strong.  Come on!  Be steady, keep panic tendencies out of the decision rooms.  Let Wayne Bryan decide, he is reasonable, he won't pull an Indian Wells.  Madness.  The Houston folks can be influenced.  They trust our thoughts, they need our courage, Vantaggio eats Virus Omlettes for breakfast.  We juice the deuce, we spin in and win, we crash the crash.  Isolationism has no place here.



"The Fear Segment" by AJ

Sadness. Madness… Pervasive. Courtesy of the fear segment of the news.



"Tamiflu"  by CB

Just started Tamiflu today.  Glad it's only 3 days.



"Pit Of Hell" by peoplesDuke

Good luck. Plenty o fluids. You'll lose 10-15 pounds and feel great in a week. I think it's Gods way of keeping us humble. Praying for you and your body to heal itself.  3 days in the pit of hell. Days 4 and 5 are adjusting back to human life.



"Indian Wells Is Cancelled" by TTop

Can't believe Indian Wells is cancelled...crazy.

The Anthem 4: Cooked Up Crow

No sour grapes here, no Designated NFM Judge bitterness, just the delicious taste of cooked up crow.  Shot, plucked, quartered, marinaded, grilled, seasoned, and enjoyed.  The marketing department of Nebraska Furniture Market couldn't have been more clear in what they were after.  An anthem of home, of feelings, of family, of sights, smells, and the pursuit of happiness.  Sell Cheap, Tell The Truth missed the mark, not even making it to the public voting round.  Of the 10 songs that advanced, 7 have the word 'home' in the title.  I used this critical word only once, tucked in the 2nd verse, after a wailing harmonica part.  Evidently, my double down on Mrs. B was a mistake.  History and company culture were largely ignored by the insiders, scoffed at by the NFM Designated Judges, they were listening for something different.  I just wanted to move product.

A cynic might conclude they're reverting to a Sell High, Tell Them Lies creed, but thankfully I'm not a cynic.  Just wish the public could've decided, my entire strategy assumed ascension to the public voting stage.  But wishes are just wishes and bitching is just bitching, they are worthless activities, a horrible way to spend time.  Frankly, a bit relieved to avoid the top 5 Omaha trip stage, where the remaining contestants receive a free one-night accommodation voucher.  Weirdly, and cheaply, travel costs to the event are not covered.  A gas card should have been offered.  But my suggestions (there are others) are for the marketing department and their lawyers, the steerers of the sales strategy, the creators of the contest rules.  Clearly, they need help.  The songwriters remaining are my heroes, and as my crow was enjoyed, I participated in the voting process.

The Danika Portz tune, House Becomes A Home, is on another level from all others.  Anthem velcro, with a perfectly executed piano opening, excellent vocal phrasing, and a noted lack of lyrical cheese.  A seasoned Nashville musician with years of USO tours and a big smile, she should run away with the $25K.  Got my vote.  The Snackboyz tune, Flex Anthem, is shockingly entertaining, they must be one of the Omaha 5.  Kyle Sexton's Home Has A Place In The Heart gets into the historical aspects of the company and is well written.  The current vote leader, 20% to 19% over Danika, is Bethany Cranfield's Welcome Home.  After another listen, appreciate the workplace culture vibe and understand the support the song is getting during the early days of voting.  Probably John Rose with Memories is next, "infinite moments, smelling the donuts" is a fabulous line.  Several could make a run.  Elections are odd, as we all know.  Enjoy Omaha, all the best to all the best.  A wine toast with wine made from the best grapes, the sweet ones, the juicy ones, the perfect ones.  The ones that aren't sour.

Some Like Hot Cheetoes is considered a classic by many.  Vantaggio, of course.  Queso, Biltmore Blonde, Two Step, Novocaine, and Cold Meat Blues.  Songs of commerce, instruments of rocketing sales, diddys of distinction.  My jingle portfolio is well stocked, some written and recorded, some just written, some just clear in my mind.  One day, years from now, The Jingle Hut, Inc. could revolutionize musical advertising.  One day, perhaps.  For now, Nebraska Furniture Mart is on their own, but Danika will bail out the marketing department.  It will be fine, just fine.  Houses will become homes. They will thrive, their Anthem will be way better than anything from The Room Store or Rooms To Go.  Truth is music, and music sells.  Vote.

20/20 Gonzo 21: Public Intoxication

A delegate dash to the Democratic National Convention.  That's what we got, folks.  Either a 78 year old male or a 77 year old male after another 78 year old male killed his campaign and a 70 year old female considers bailing out.  All are considered Caucasian by most objective observers.  Too soon to tell if the lack of diversity, or inclusion, will hurt them in the November general election against the Republican candidate.

Interesting this war on the undiversified dairy industry, have mixed emotions. While no other mammal drinks the milk of another mammal, main concern is the potential elimination of cheese.  Think of Italian or Tex-Mex without it, depressing at best, inedible at worst.  A world without queso seems odd, but gotta respect the fight for female cows.  A dairy gig has got to be the worst, grass grazing and slaughterhouse processing seems the better option for any cow, regardless of gender.

Lines were long on Super Tuesday in Texas.  Surprised to see 72 year old Joe Walsh running for President of the United States on the Republican side.  Really like his stuff with the James Gang and his impact on the Eagles is well known, but it seems some political experience could help his chances.  Guess he's attended to his closet skeletons, all research indicates he's a cool dude, nothing too sinister, nothing too lame.  Probably a few speeding tickets, maybe a public intoxication, some minor hotel vandalism allegations, nothing major.