10/4/26

Burnt Aggie Gonzo 2: Pig Out

 

My advice is to never act on my predictions.  Mock them, brush them off, laugh at them, but do not act on them, put no money up.  The Hogs were overwhelmed by the Aggies, a blowout, a mismatch, a good ole hog killing in College Station. Lots of loud Bon Jovi and lights, lots of people familiar with each other, lots of boots.  Thinking back, it's the most people I've ever been around, almost 108,000; I was out of my element.


Kyle Field seemed like a massive baby pen for the 12th Man, Woman, and Child.  This was my true first impression of the architecture--no bullshit flattery, no respecting of their chants and trivial traditions, none of their shitty beer, this is Burnt Aggie Gonzo with the lowdown on the downlow.  Maroon is the shade of maroon in the middle of it all.  Dr. Capone rooted just enough to maintain his campus standing, but he was more techy, more red and black, more western; he bled for the Red Raiders in the 80s and the 90s jumping like a jackrabbit jumps. However, he accepted this gawdy spectacle way back, go along, go along, "Aggie First Down!", rah, rah, boom, bah, bam.


Sixth row, 30 yard line seats had me up tight on the action and right behind the Arkansas bench.  They were scrawny, mopey, and bland.  Coach Silverfield has his work cut out for him, he sounded baffled and discouraged and confused at his post game press conference.  Start with a Chinese buffet, I say, pig out all afternoon, get fatter as soon as possible.  Nice game from the Aggie QB, played like a poor 12th Man's Vince Young, he could potentially take them to the Alamo Bowl.

10/2/26

Burnt Aggie Gonzo 1: Better QB

 

When Dr. Tone Capone notified me of a free ticket and a spot to crash, the early October trip to Kyle Field in College Station was decided.  And why not, the Arkansas Razorbacks were travelling south to play Texas A&M, I was curious about all the fuss, all the yells, and all the 12th Man lore.  Truth is, I'm an orangeblood from way back, my pops played for Darryl Royal from '60-'62, he was a big dude, strong and mean.  Mocked Aggies, hated Sooners, ignored Red Raiders, and didn't trust Razorbacks.  He was never really into any of it, mostly jokes, stories, old buddies, and offensive line insights; he was always watching the big fellas.


I never liked the Aggies much for those reasons and others, they seemed incompetent, smug, gullible, and loud, a horrible mix of traits.  Sorta stuck up almost, somewhere between pride and buffoonery with a military twist, but somehow, still likeable.  Respect the consistency, I suppose, don't want them as enemies, don't want any enemies.  Just wanna be entertained, just observing.


Early in the college football season and both these teams are 2-2, on must-win alert, on panic button, on thin ice.  The Aggie head coach gets a million dollars per game, he doesn't seem worried.  The other head coach just got to town this season and the Hog fans are wearing paper bags over their heads and boycotting games. A two touchdown underdog, their only losses are against highly ranked teams, the Aggies lost to Kentucky.  I've done exhausting, extensive research, Hogs got the better QB, take the points.

Burnt Aggie Gonzo 2: Pig Out

  My advice is to never act on my predictions.  Mock them, brush them off, laugh at them, but do not act on them, put no money up.  The Hogs...