jpaulgorman

  I write this chapter as therapy, as a pill, as a meditation, as a prescription, as a minor lobotomy.  Survival mode is only encountered a few times in a lifetime; possible scenarios, impossible scenarios, contingencies, mood manipulation, water, food, shelter, energy.  Prayer.  Usually, it's encountered alone.  Many times it's a result of your own mistakes, your own stubbornness and stupidity, your unawareness, but none of that mattered as I sat stranded in my car on eastbound Interstate 20 west of Weatherford, Texas, helpless, as 18wheeler after 18wheeler jack knifed trying to get up the hills on ice. It was 24 degrees.  The day before I was in 80 degrees, playing golf on the border at Lajitas, now this.  I pulled up on the rough stretch of highway around 5 in the afternoon, the previous 6 hours in the car flew by, I left the El Viejo Adobe in Alpine around 11am, north to Monahans on State1776-- Revolution Road, then picking up I-20, back to the ea...

  Shook off Mason the next morning, packed up quick and headed west.  It's a nice enough town, but stuck a bit; the mostly empty Lea Lou bar closed down around 9pm to the Pet Shop Boys on the digital jukebox.  I needed rest, and it was a good place for rest.  On the way to Junction, Texas, where I would connect with I-10, I searched for the town of Grit.  Could only find an establishment called The Wildlife Ranch, Inc., and it was closed, I sped on. On the Interstate out west of Junction, the speed limit is 80 MPH, which means there's really no speed limit.  I set the cruise for 88 MPH.  "Eight you're great, nine you're mine", a former State Trooper once gave me the scoop years ago.  He also debunked my suspicion of quotas in the profession, they were called activity points.  Looking forward to robots taking over for human drivers, put the smokies back on the crime beat, but I digress, my feelings are known. Arrived in Alpine in the late af...

  Two nights in the Austin lights, from Lamar to Congress, grubbing good in between:  En Fuego tacos, LoRo Asian BBQ (evidently, affiliated with Franklin's),  Elizabeth Street Cafe, and Kerby Lane's.  I was beat, I was full, music racked my brain, time to move west.  Abandoned the Guadalupe Mountains idea, the magnetic pull wasn't enough to overcome the thought of an 8 hour drive, much of it at night.  Based on a recommendation from my landlord Chris, it was to Mason, Texas, only a 3 hour drive, to the Lea Lou CoOp, a conglomerate of a restaurant, a night club, lodging, and a ball room barn located downtown on the square.  The drive was delicious, through the heart of the hill country, Lea Lou's was indeed cool, the accomodations outstanding, but there was no one around, hardly anyone. After checking in, I took a look around the town on my bike, usually the best way to look around a town--or a city.  I saw an historical house that a preacher buil...

  The final act at the Continental Club in Austin on Tuesday nights is The Last Jimenez.  Show time was midnight, and after watching James McMurtry and his band put on a full out rock show, I needed to hang out for awhile and get my equilibrium back, enjoy a late beer.  Delay my exit, glow in the show's aftermath, my house on Mary Street was only a mile away.  McMurtry was quick and precise with his lyrics, clenching his teeth to finish off the lines.  Grinding the syllables. He sang about Okie kinfolks, the myth of road life, and giving up his Cadillac, among other things.  At one point he went off mic and played solo acoustic just to shut up the crowd in the back, who were committing the concert sin of paying no attention and screaming at each other.  The room shhh'ed and shhh'ed, but still the annoying talkers persisted, they had no clue.  Finally, with as much clarity as possible, slow and just loud enough, I turned to the group of corporate h...

  I'm not sure if it was Lady Bird's idea, but the downtown Austin lake was at peak beauty in the Janurary afternoon, the sky was bright blue with puff clouds reflecting the sun rays.  Brilliant and cool, cool enough for shorts, cool enough for long sleeves.  Ten miles around, some paved, some gravel, some boardwalk.  Rain was predicted the next day, I was advised by my landlord to bike ride the day of my arrival, if I wanted to bike ride.  Glad I did, saw the famed Stevie Ray Vaughn statue up close, dug several city murals, people were out, running, walking, living. The Bob Schneider show wasn't til 8:30, my cousin was picking me up at 7:30, Saxon Pub was close.  My place on Mary Street was decked out in Texan fashion, flags around, all representing some Texas connection.  An old south side house, renovated and renewed, now a home to those passing through.  The place was a sprawling homestead, two separate houses, a huge back area for cars and t...

  And again, to the road.  The perfected time of winter, when many brush off travel, and stay locked away for weeks at a time, blue and warm.  That's when the Hook of Texas is at it again, like some massive, magnetic rock formation pulling at all my senses; see the mountains, hear the silence, feel the music, smell the clean air, taste the 44 Farms ribeye, balance it all.  But first to Austin, for the Bob Schnieder Monday night show at the Saxon Pub.  If ya know, ya know. Arrangements for this perpetually incomplete adventure were made a couple of weeks prior, with beaching family trips booked on the horizon, this was my chance to get back, drive around, know more.  From Austin, I'll go west, likely to Van Horn.  Close to the Guadalupe Mountains.  Then, south to the El Veijo Adobe, my spot in Alpine, to launch days of smaller road trips.  Out there, it's divide and conquer. A loose list of aspirations include:  Bob at the Saxon with my...

  Warning scenes and market low boiling, on medium high.  Suit up and talk about reactions and moves.  Think opposite.  Don't sweat the open, don't sweat the close.   Look up once a month. Planes are flying, cars are driving, the hum from the road.  Dark clouds slipped by, off to the east, to fill those Texas lakes again--Cooper, Lavon, Tawakoni, Fork, and Bois D'Ark.  Future drinks and flushes, green lawns and swimming pools.  Water is of the utmost importance, the essential element.  Word. The first quarter is child's play, adjustments must be made way before halftime.  Before its too late.  Get on the line, this second quarter is busting, stretch it out, go for the score.  Let the heroes be heroes.  Just for one day.

  Who are these lawyers?  The ones that find documents, like paper matters anymore, like we're hillbillies out here, riding on cantaloupe trucks, with toothpicks and shoe holes.  Digital copies, virtual copies, meta copies, get on with it, leak away.  Screenprint if you must, save the glow forever.  These lawyers are takers and on-the-takers, these lawyers are the actual grease. So much cannot be known, but they found those 11 pages, or so.  Applied to the Theory Of So, so what's next?  Things we can say and not say, things we can infer and not infer, taboo is the new taboo.  Daughter of Elvis, ex wife of Michael Jackson, a true Queen.  Poor girl was roughly my age, too early, too early for cardiac arrest. The toes and fingers must be felt, get that hot blood melt.  Knock out the knots, no room for clots, cycle through, cycle through.  One more time, 'til your brain's been drowned, upside down, swish it around.  Invert the st...

And now, driving in 65 degrees fahrenheit, blue skies overhead, sunroofing, the thoughts of gratitude and blessings.  Storms come and go, rivers find their way to the sea, as the paraphrases go.  A farmer who fed millions, maybe billions, a man that made something from nothing through cultivation, irrigation, and technical innovation.  Too icy to see the High Bridge, and no time to stop over in Madison County, either.  It was 5 degrees fahrenheit last Friday morning, had to get back to Texas. A time for work and a time for rest, a time to take and a time to bless.  Evaluate, evaluate.  A time for sugar and a time for wine, a time for bread and a time for rhymes.  Evaluate, evaluate.  A time to laugh and a time to cry, a time to live and a time to die. Rivers freeze in Iowa in the winter, they ski off hills, best ribeye I've had in awhile.  The wind is vicious, coming in heavy from the north country.  Cold.  They gather and pray, the...

  No one in the schoolhouse, these teachers are dumb.  Their pictures are small, their minds are closed, they have blurred vision.  No clarity, only fog.  Blue skies are above, beyond a tax credit, oblivious to incentives.  Keep the trees, escape the windmill spectacle, figure out fusion, oil it up 'til then. Radiation games of destruction, the nuclear option.  Our piss poor elected officials, egos by the kilos.  Filibuster this, buster.  We don't care and it doesn't matter.  Your bounce house games. Cause a ruckus, ditch the decorum.  The aisle is a clogged vein.  Those on the left chant, those on the right moan.  They deal seats like a casino dealer deals cards.  Under the table and through the sleeves.