Ninety-Six Magnavox

scooted that monster from the garage
too heavy and awkward to pick up
'specially for my 2nd half back

make sure the bones are protected
what a glory it was
big and bright

biggest tube ever owned in my family
up 'til that time anyway
the glove that didn't fit

green day
the steroid rangers
the heroic cowboys

and their 3 inch headlines
stared and stared for so many hours
hypnotized and surrounded by sound

in stereo
teletubbies and dora
the blue house bear

nine eleven catatonic and weary
no planes in the sky
spirit of braveheart

electronics crashing
asteroids and space invaders
tennis matches and an unbeaten streak

lost flippers and late night shows
weather worries and tragedy channels
where are they now

behind the music
thank God steely dan won the grammy
everything is outsync

stanley cup full of gravy
go stars
men eating grubs

desperate women
dog shows and gator trappers
oil just spilling in the ocean

cramer cried about the bond market
bet he got a bailout
recounts and chads

i did not have relations with that woman
protests and bombs and murders
c-span boring us to death

rather, washington boring us to death
the last waltz
when it had all been done

green was purple
and popping noises
sitting with a pile of junk now

ready for burial
that ninety-six magnavox thirty-three inch was a good television
real heavy though.